The Quartermaster

[Airan]

Character Name: Pasha Shapalashi
Species: Marine Iguana
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Category: Quartermaster


Predictably, the stoat captain wrinkled his nose and recoiled upon sight of Pasha. Mammals. They were all the same. He did his best to recover, smoothing his fur and clearing his throat. He spun his quill thoughtfully in one paw and leaned back in his chair with a creak of old wood.

?You have qualifications, I presume??

She slapped a piece of parchment in front of him without a word. The less she had to say, the better. Not that she couldn?t speak their strange tongue, but it was ugly. Ugly to her ears, as she was to their eyes.

He scanned the document, eyes growing wide as he stroked the white fur of his chin. Soft. They were all soft. Soft and fluffy and weak. Even the leaders, much as they tried to hide it. Yet she had to feign submission.
Travel was not cheap, and even if she had her own ship she would still have to pay a crew to sail it. In the end, the best way she could think to stay afloat was to be part of a crew (irritating as that may be).

?This is quite the map,? the stoat murmured, ?I haven?t even heard of some of these lands. Is there any place you have not visited??

?The right place,? she answered inwardly. Despite their relentless search, she and her mate had not found a suitable island. Now, she was running out of time. She felt an abrupt wave of urgency ? such that a shiver along her back rattled her spines. How many weeks had it been since she?d been with Andreas? He had been dead nearly four. She remembered him broken against the rocks, the morning after the storm. A reef had gutted their ship and he had perished along with all of the cavvy slave crew. After all they had been through, crossing half a world to reach this foreign land, he died before setting a single claw on its cursed shore.

Pasha had been lucky, and even luckier to have recovered her chest of maps and notes from the wreckage. It had been her job to document and explore each shore they came across, testing the sands for suitability. But it was always too cold ? a constant, miserable, and sun-forsaken cold; which is why that unexpectedly warm and sunny day before the storm had affected them so profoundly, despite their failure.

The stoat was talking again and Pasha refocused her sluggish mind on the warm-blood.

??into consideration. Thank you for your interest. Where are you staying, in case we need to contact you??

?Green Frog Inn,? she stated as clearly as her deep, hissing voice was able. It still took the stoat a moment to comprehend. Or perhaps he was simply unnerved. He made a note and gave her a dismissive nod.

As Pasha stepped through the small door frame, her spikes bent and sprung back up like a giant claw across a comb. Just outside, a weasel and rat lurched out of her way with shocked expressions. Evidently, they had been about to enter. She heard them whispering loudly after she had passed.

?Gates! Didja see the size o? that lizard bloke??

?Ugliest mug I ever did see??

?Shhhhh! He?ll hear ya!?

Pasha was not surprised by their remarks or even that they mistook her for a male. Most did, as they could not fathom a creature with her face being feminine. That and her attire was rather neutral. Among sailors it was probably better that they not know. Reptile or not, it was considered bad luck in this region for a female to be aboard a vessel.

Another wave rattled down her spine and she paused apprehensively before picking up her pace. At last she reached the inn and hurried up the stairs and into her room, slamming and bolting the door behind her. She pressed her bumpy forehead against the woodgrain, shutting her amber-colored eyes, and sucked in deep breaths.

Time had run out.

[Airan]

Character Name: Morra Sharptongue
Species: Ferret
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Category: Quartermaster


THUD!

A ball of frayed rope fell from the roof of Morra?s quarters and into her paw, and moments later it flew right back up. Smashing against the roof with another satisfying thud, the ball dropped back into the ferret?s grip. After a few more goes at this, the ferret finally caught the ball and plopped it onto the desk in front of her. Morra craned her neck to look out the porthole behind the puffy armchair she was draped across, then groaned. Light was shining in. Sunlight.

Sulking, the ferret turned towards the door and screeched. ?Toothache!? After a joyously silent minute passed, Morra grumbled. Clenching the sides of her chair, the ferret braced herself to scream once more. ?TOOTHACHE-?She was immediately interrupted by her door being flung open. A weasel rushed in, out of breath.

?Yessir, yew . . . need me . . . sir?? The weasel managed to squeak out in between pants. A smile crossed Morra?s face.

?Well good mornin? Toothache. How ya been?? As Toothache struggled to reply Morra simply waved her paw. ?Ya don? need to answer, I know ya haven?t been enjoyin? yourself. I just need a report is all.?

Toothache nodded, catching his breath. ?Yessir. The crew were fed, the slaves were handled, and the jobs?ve been posted fer the mates. We?s jest need the new prisoners process?d ?fore we be shovin? off.?

?And ya won?t have any trouble with doin? that piece o? cake job, eh?? Morra crooned, an even toothier grin lining her features.

Eyes narrowed, Toothache mused. ?Ain?t yew the one who?s gotta do that??

The ferret gave him a sly wink. ?A lil? extra rum for ya dinner says I?m not.? The weasel?s eyes brightened as he stammered out a thanks, clumsily rushing to his duties. Morra cleared her throat.

?Now hold on a sec, pal. Before ya go an? do that I need ya to bring Mr. Kril to me.? Toothache hesitated, then with a nervous nod, dashed off.

* * *

THUD! THUD! THUD!

This time, Morra?s door was making the obnoxious racket. The ferret rolled her eyes. ?Come in Mr. Kril! I?ve been waitin? on the edge of me seat.? A hideously obese rat burst into the room. Slamming the door behind him, Mr. Kril jabbed his finger at Morra as he marched towards her desk.

?I?ll be tellin? the cap?n ?bout this, ye hear?? Mr. Kril slammed his fists on the desk. ?I ain?t lettin? ye sleep? the days away. Not this time.?

?Tell Cap?n what?? Morra scoffed, sliding deeper into her seat. ?That I did my job? I hope ya do, it?d be real sweet.?

Mr. Kril?s glare grew deadlier as he clenched his paws. ?I ain?t doin? yer job no more, ferret. Ye may have the cap?n good an? fooled, but not me. Ye ain?t good fer nothin?.?

Morra chuckled. ?Oh Mr. Kril, the cap?n don?t care who does what so long as the work?s done. Besides, workin? with the crew may even gain ya some o? their respect.? The ferret winked.

Mr. Kril was unfazed. ?I already have their respect. I ain?t the only one sick o? yer spit.?The rat growled. ?I ain?t kiddin?, neither. I?ll have ?em throw ye over the side. Then we?ll be seein? who?s friends?ll be helpin? who.?

?You silly Fat Rat,? the ferret jeered, leaning towards Mr. Kril. ?My crew?ll slit your throat before ya even start askin? for help pushin? me over.?

The rat sneered right back at her. ?They don? like ye as much as ye think. A few more months at sea?ll make sure o? that.?

Lounging back into her seat, Morra shrugged. ?Maybe ya right. But??She flashed the rat a devilish smile. ?Maybe ya wrong. We?ll be findin? out soon enough.? Then, plucking the rope ball off the desk, the ferret wryly continued. ?Now if ye?ll excuse me, I have work to do.?

[Airan]

Character: Vasily Izhets
Species: Cat
Gender: Male
Age: Indeterminate
Category: Quartermaster

There was a ship.

Vasily Izhets didn?t know much about boats, but he guessed this wasn?t one of the better ones. He didn?t have much of a choice, though; he and that ship had the same destination in mind.

Well, that was a lie. But only in the details, and who paid attention to those?

He cast around a bit until he found a discarded brick in the back of the alley, then spread his cloak out on the ground, placed the brick in the middle, and wrapped it into a slightly oblong bundle. Then he picked it up and stepped into the noisy street.

?Clear a path!? he shouted, dramatically clutching the bundle close to his chest. ?My wife?s on board that ship, and she left our kit behind!?

Slowly the mob parted and Vasily passed through, making sure to soulfully thank everyone he could. Finally, he reached the gangplank and unsteadily walked up to the deck, where his path was barred by a large ferret?s spear.

?I have absolutely no idea what you?re goin? on about. We?ve got no mother cats on this ship; I?d know, I?m the Quartermaster.?

Well, on to Plan B then.

Vasily straightened up, patted down his shirt, and tossed the bundle overboard, eliciting gasps and a few cheers from the assembled crowd. Everyone loved a good show.

?Fine, that was a lie. Truth is, I?m on something of a noble quest. My sister?s been captured by a rich pirate who?s also after the treasure, and he plans to force her to be his bride. Please, help me.?

The Quartermaster stood digesting this for a while, ignoring the increasingly loud calls of his crewmates as they made the final preparations. Finally, he gave Vasily his conclusion:

?...You?re an idiot.?

?You have surprisingly acute judgment, my good sir, for that was also a lie.? Mostly. ?But I do have one truth to tell you today.?

The ferret?s brow furrowed and he leaned forward. ?And what?d that be??

The cat also leaned in, keeping one paw on the Quartermaster?s right shoulder and his eyes fixated on something to the right of the pirate?s head.

?That would be....? said Vasily, drawing every word out over his tongue.

?What?!? growled the pirate.

?...goodbye,? finished the cat, giving his companion?s shoulder a hard shove to the left. At the same moment the gangplank lurched under them as the ship started its journey out of the harbor. Vasily curled his tail under the ferret?s legs as he stumbled, and tipped him off into the water below. With creative curses ringing in his ears he sprinted up the plank and jumped on board just before it completely separated from the ship. He then collapsed on deck, tongue lolling out of his mouth, and watched the clouds roll by as he contemplated his lack of physical fitness.

?Hey, who the hell are you?? asked a searat, nudging him with his boot.The pirate looked around. ?And where?s our Quartermaster? I ?eard ?e was late gettin? on board, did he just desert us??

?About that,? replied the cat, sitting up. ?Apparently he had a family emergency and had to leave. I?m his replacement.?

?Family emergency? He ain?t got no family.?

Vasily grinned. ?That?s the point, actually. Apparently he made some promises to a girl, her father got involved??

?Ah, say no more. You know anythin? about bein? a quartermaster??

?That was my last job, actually,? he said. Surprisingly, that wasn?t a lie.

?Well, I suppose you?ll ?ave to do then. By the power granted to me by bein? Second Mate, I ?ereby promote you to Quartermaster. Now go do yer job.?

Vasily pulled himself up and meandered his way towards where he assumed the storeroom lay. Mulling over the events of the day, he concluded that he was looking forward to the conclusion of this whole mess.

Well, that was a lie.