Smile Like You Mean It

[Thrayjen]

Thrayjen looked down at his body, astonished that his ribs were hidden not by comfortable fat but by firm muscle. He hadn?t been so fit in seasons, Nan?s cooking had seen to that, but muscles from his younger years were returning and he had slimmed down. As Blue helped him slide into a tunic of cloth and then one of chainmail, Thrayjen couldn?t help but admire himself in the long mirror that perched on the wall in Drake?s armory.

The blacksmith fox lifted a thick, shining leather jerkin up to the rat, who looked with curiosity at the design. Its ebony black surface was broken by the indentations of dramatized musculature, and a vicious kraken that stretched with intimidating appendages heralded Thrayjen?s stage name.

Thrayjen ran a claw along the etching before he lifted his arms up and allowed Blue and Drake to close the thick armour around him. Leather gauntlets and leg braces that also bore the kraken sigil, were added, and after every buckle was tightened and the armor fit snug, Thrayjen stopped adjusting his spaulders and looked at himself.

?I?I haven?t seen anything this fine in ages,? Thrayjen said as he admired the leatherwork. He paced around the room, rolling his shoulders, squatting, bouncing on his feet until he came back to the mirror. He looked at himself again, grinning as Blue met his eye in the reflection.

Drake whistled as his tail wagged. Blue hopped from one footpaw to the other as she clung to the fox?s thick arm, barely able to restrain her excitement. The fox nudged her forward and she bolted, twisting around Thrayjen to inspect him from every angle.

?It?s beautiful!? Blue cooed, her claws wriggling as she reached out to touch the kraken sigil.

?That?s what happens when I have time and materials,? Drake said matter-of-factly, then licked his lips as he eyed his handiwork on Thrayjen with pride. ?Nire gave me a lot to work with when he ordered the hide preserved. It?s from a beast that-?

?It?s almost a shame to mar it,? Thrayjen interrupted, picturing the dozens of terrifying monsters Nire kept in the Fell Wing. ?But?it almost begs to be used.?

?Aye,? Drake said, clapping Thrayjen on the back and smiling widely in mutual appreciation. ?It?ll do you well, if you treat it well.?

?You?ll be oilin? it every day before trainin?, aye,? Blue said sternly.

?Oh, I will,? Thrayjen said, unable to disguise his childlike wonder at the armor. Paired with his black fur, he cut the figure of a looming shadow, lean and waiting to strike.

As Drake found space for permanently storing the new armor, Blue began to help the rat out of his gear only to find her paws unnecessary. The rat quickly undid every buckle and strap with practised ease and the ferret looked at him sidelong. Thrayjen ignored her as he turned the leather over in his paws, counting the reaching tentacles that stretched like the whiskers on his face.

?Have you heard anything yet?? Thrayjen asked, his eyes narrowing as he returned Blue?s look. The ferret clucked her tongue indignantly. She took the half plate from Thrayjen?s paws and replaced it onto the wooden mannequin Drake had pulled it from.

?You?re bein? impatient,? Blue chided him, undoing his gauntlets and braces. ?I already said that I?d tell you anythin? I found out.?

?I?m not being impatient,? Thrayjen said lowly, curling a lip in displeasure. ?I?m waiting patiently, playing Nire?s little games with Aldridge.?

Thrayjen?s eyes were still tired from the previous night?s performance. Aldridge?s flaming arrows had struck true every shot, sending baskets oiled with alchemic ingredients into a blaze of colourful flames, much to the amusement of the spectators. Thrayjen had missed thrice. Nire?s less violent, discounted shows brought in families with dibbuns who otherwise couldn?t afford a ticket. ?Family Evening of Fantastic Fantasy?, the lynx had billed it as, and burned everything from baskets to glowing disks Thrayjen had hurled into the air for Aldridge to shoot at. Thrayjen?s mouth thinned, unable to stop himself from wondering if the pretty fire would have startled or enthralled Helix and Verna.

?A good thing, aye,? Blue interrupted his thoughts, her tone turning bitter at the mention of the stoat. ?He?s been causin? more fuss than not, and Nire is pushin? the trainers to discipline more and more for smaller and smaller indiscretions. He?ll put Aldridge up against Bessie if Aldridge isn?t careful. If he?d act more like you, maybe Nire would be givin? him lovely armor.?

Thrayjen frowned, looking at the armor and wondering if the lynx would grant such a large favour simply because the rat behaved. His attention was snatched away by Blue?s claws digging into his ear.

?I?m stickin? my neck out for you,? Blue chided him. Her voice lowered until it became a frustrated hiss. ?Nire?s gettin? angry about somethin? new every day, and yet every day I tell him somethin? good about you. So, when the time comes and we find out if you?re little ones are alive, maybe Nire won?t keep them from you like he does everyone else.? She let him go, handing him a pair of boots.

Thrayjen blessed Blue?s matronly nature. He hadn?t considered that she had been thinking about more than modest closure for her charge?s mind; seldom were slaves allowed to see their captured children for more than a few minutes, and only if they had performed exceptionally well. Not even the Monster of Mossflower, who had impressed the fickle lynx, had been allowed more than a scant few moments with her pup.

?Stay patient, aye,? Blue said, gentler than before. ?They might not even be alive, anyway.?

The ferret?s grim sense of reality carved a deep frown on Thrayjen?s face. He was helpless against the tugging of hope but Blue spoke truth, and the gentle reminder of the Crater?s cruelty stayed Thrayjen from blindly believing his heart.

?Aye,? he replied.

The rat remained quiet when Drake returned. He gave his thanks and complimented Drake?s craftsmanship, but the rat?s thoughts kept meandering towards the hedgehogs. If they were alive, were they alright? Were they cared for as Hapley had said, or would it have been kinder for Nire to abandon them to their shack to starve?

Thoughts of doubt turned to thoughts of fear. A terrible question haunted Thrayjen that the rat couldn?t shake.

If Helix and Verna are alive, why hasn?t Nire used them against me? Why hasn?t he forced me to confess to being the Blackwhiskers? He made it clear he didn?t believe my story and, even if he had, why hasn?t he simply made me pretend? And now, this armor?

?Miss Blue?? Tegue knocked politely on the open door of the armory. ?Sorry to interrupt, but I have a message for you. From Lord Nire.?

Drake waved him inside and the rat handed Blue a rolled piece of paper. Blue unfurled it and began to read. Her frowning face twisted into a smile as her eyes trailed from one side of the page to the other. Folding up the note, Blue winked at Thrayjen.

?Nire wants to see you.?

Thrayjen winced. The foul taste from his last meeting with Nire still lingered on his tongue.

~*~

The heavy ornate doors loomed up in front of Thrayjen once again. He watched as the rat guards in blue, ever present on either side of the threshold, lowered their spears when Blue approached. One of them gave Thrayjen a friendly wave upon recognizing the taller rat before knocking and announcing Blue and her charge.

Nire?s high-pitched voice called Thrayjen in and the guards opened the doors. From behind his desk, the lynx held up a paw as Blue led Thrayjen inside.

?Thank-you, Miss Blue. The meeting for the new cargo being brought in will be an hour later than previously scheduled. I look forward to your opinions on the fresh meat.?
Blue gave a salute to the lynx. ?Lookin? forward to it, my Lord!? She bowed herself out, throwing Thrayjen a wink as she closed the doors behind her.

Nire smiled as he watched Blue leave.

?She?s going to go far. Just like Khor. You?re very lucky.? Nire gestured for Thrayjen to sit in the chair before his desk.

?I was hoping to make a trip to see you earlier, in the armory. Tell me, how did you find your new attire? Drake?s quite the master, but if anything is amiss, do let me know.?

It took a moment before Thrayjen realized Nire was serious. The rat blinked, stammering slightly as he formed an answer.

?It, uh, thank you, the armor was quite comfortable. Master Drake is an artisan at his craft.?

?Did you like the kraken?? Nire?s teeth poked out from beneath his lips as he smiled.

?A terrifying sigil, yes. Quite handsome.?

?Good. You don?t disappoint. It surprised me you hadn?t scooped up a sponsor already, however.?

?I don?t have a taste for bloodlust.? Thrayjen shrugged.  ?Other beasts show better.?

?Nonsense,? Nire purred. Thrayjen begged his fur to stay flat. ?I see great potential for you here in my Crater.? The lynx leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms out in front of himself and sliding into a comfortable position. ?I can help you, you know. Help you become great. So, I?ve decided to sponsor you, officially.? The cat grinned gleefully. ?I don?t often do this; Timberfell always cries foul when my fighters win, but I see so much in you just waiting to be?unleashed.?

Nire?s kindness, his sponsorship, his gifts, it was all a pretty box that hid greed and ambition. The lord of The Crater wanted something. Thrayjen?s whiskers twitched; he knew well that beasts of power did not give anything for free.

?My Lord!? Thrayjen exclaimed, feigning surprise. He bowed his head in grateful posture. ?I?m honoured.?

?Blue says you?re a dependable beast,? Nire continued, satiated with the rat?s response. ?I like that. You work hard; I like that, too. You?ve done well in each show.? The lynx smirked, twirling a whisker with a claw. ?Of course, the moment I let my friends know this, they?ll be trying to snatch you up. Envy is a terrible curse that seems to pursue me.?

The gifts, the sponsorship?

All of it had come after Nire?s accusations.

Nire?s discovery, Thrayjen corrected himself.

?They can stay envious, then, my Lord,? Thrayjen said sternly. ?My loyalty is to my Master, and nobeast else.?

Nire wanted Thrayjen?s trust, so Thrayjen would play a game of his own. Let the cat think he owned him. Let Nire shower him with praise and armor and gold teeth. He?d be the tyrant?s fighter, and for every deed done in Nire?s name, Thrayjen would come closer to Helix and Verna.

?Excellent,? Nire said, his grin widening. ?I trust you when you say that, I do, Thrayjen. When one lord gives his word to another, I believe them.?

Thrayjen stiffened, his brace against the inevitable crumbling when finality slammed into him. Nire raised a brow and Thrayjen realized his reaction had been seen, had been noted. He knew Nire would have brought up his past, again and again, until he had what he wanted, but Thrayjen had maintained hope that Hracken the Kraken would remain more interesting to the cat than a ghost story barely known amongst the local Mossflower beasts.

Nire?s favour was for more than inspiring a good show, Thrayjen reminded himself.

Show him what he wants and he?ll be blinded. Thrayjen thought bitterly. I?m sorry, Nan. I have to?

?Oh,? Thrayjen said, leaning back in his chair in an attempt to look comfortable. With every ounce of his strength, he restrained his paws from trembling, neatly folding them in his lap. ?The Blackwhiskers. Yes, I suppose it?s time.?

Nire stood up, staring at Thrayjen before hastily digging through a drawer on his desk. The lynx pulled a familiar map out and unfurled it over his desk, piercing the paper with his claw as he marked the realm of Muskroarka.

?I knew it,? Nire breathed, his short tail whipping back and forth. ?I knew it!? The lynx slammed his paw down excitedly. His lips pursed, frowning in an attempt to disguise his glee as anger. ?Yet you hid it from me. How dare you?!?

?An exiled prince is a usurper in waiting,? Thrayjen said levelly, drumming his claws on his knee. ?If my brother-?

?King Greyvayyan!? Nire exclaimed.

?If my younger brother,? Thrayjen said again, slower and more pointedly, watching Nire quiver, ?heard I was alive, he?d send assassins.?

Nire made a loud whining sound, clasping his paws together and falling into his chair.

?Assassins come and go!? Nire said as he collected himself. He cleared his throat. ?Don?t fret about such nonsense. My guards protect my property.?

?Precisely,? Thrayjen replied. He waited until Nire quirked a brow before he continued. ?If Greyvayyan heard I was here, in the Crater, where fighters from all over the world congregate?he?d assume I have an army and he?d send his own. You?d resist. His army is much bigger. It?s a gamble nobeast dare.?

Chuckling, the lynx rose from his chair again and strolled to his window. Overlooking the pits, Nire smirked as he watched banners being hoisted. From over Nire?s shoulder, Thrayjen saw his kraken flutter beside a red fishhook on a dark field.

?Once again, I find your worrying to be ridiculous. Your brother, his armies, it matters not. My Crater entertains all who step inside, and has tamed many monsters in its day; the tyrant of Muskroarka would be no different, I assure you.?

You don?t know anything, Thrayjen thought, barely able to restrain a sneer. His whiskers twitched. Read your maps and gloat. I?m half tempted to let you destroy yourself.

?Still,? Nire drawled, glancing back at the rat. ?You kept a secret from me. You lied to my face.?

Urgency drove Thrayjen?s pulse to race. He would not lose Nire?s favour, not when the cat paved such a straight road to Helix and Verna.

?I?m home here,? Thrayjen said quietly. Nire?s ears twitched and Thrayjen breathed in. ?I didn?t fully realize the strength of the Crater. I?worried for naught. Forgive me, my Lord. You were right.?

?Of course I?m right,? Nire snapped, though the corners of his mouth curled in a smile. ?I appreciate your concern for your home, however. I?m glad you see it that way.? The cat?s lips stretched even further until his teeth were bared in a broad grin. ?Younger brother, you said??

?Aye,? Thrayjen grunted nonchalantly.

?You?re going to do great things, I know it,? Nire immediately said. ?Just do one little favour for me, won?t you??

When Thrayjen cocked his head, the lynx delicately knocked a claw against his teeth.

?Smile more when you?re in the pits. Show off that lovely gold tooth of yours.?

Whiskers twitching uncomfortably, Thrayjen forced himself to grin wide enough that Nire could see the metal.

?Perfect. I want beasts to see that I treat my favourites properly.?

~*~

Thrayjen made his way down the Drag, the bracelet Nire had given him snug against his wrist as he headed for the mess hall. The symbols etched into the metal band were reminiscent of the markings on his collar, but Nire had explained the empty square with an arrow through it meant he had access to go where he wished until Hargorn would take the bracelet back later that night.

Another grab at loyalty. He was forgiving considering I lied. Too forgiving. He wants more than a fighter.

The rat twisted his face, recalling Aldridge sitting with Thrayjen?s father one night while a storm had pelted the castle with hail and cold rain. He had been envious, wanting to sit by his father?s side and talk nonsense instead of the usual dutiful politics. He had wanted to be warm by the fire and warm in his father?s company, but it had never come.

Nire doesn?t want a friend. He?s not a scruffy furred rat pup barely grown into his tail.

?What did Nire want?? A familiar voice behind Thrayjen startled the rat. Thrayjen whipped around to see Trainer Hapley chewing on an apple.

?Good afternoon,? Thrayjen greeted Hapley.

?Is that a new shirt?? the fox asked, wiping juice from his chin.

?Aye,? Thrayjen said quietly, suddenly self-conscious and he tugged on the hem of his shirt.

?Well, not surprised. You and Aldridge have been doing well in Nire?s ?family? shows. Not bad, either, cleaning up the monsters the Reaper leaves behind,? Hapley mused, a hint of pride in his voice when he mentioned his own trainee. ?Who?s your sponsor??

Thrayjen considered the trainer, reminded of the fox?s prying nature and the anxieties he had caused the last time they spoke.

?Nire,? Thrayjen stated, countering Hapley?s own note of pride. The rat swallowed hard, his tongue suddenly dry.

Hapley held a paw up nonchalantly, finishing off his snack and beckoning Thrayjen to walk with him. The rat gave an audible sigh as he looked longingly into the mess hall, but Hapley merely chuckled and began to lead Thrayjen in a leisurely stroll down the Drag.

?Rumour has it you?re quite the gentlebeast,? Hapley said. ?I didn?t believe it at first, especially after your fight with Raggabrash and Ripfang. I thought you might be dangerous.? The fox ignored Thrayjen?s snort. ?Blue said that you tried to help your partner when he was in the Fell Wing. Tried to talk some sense into him.?

Thrayjen shrugged nonchalantly, Aldridge?s bruises still fading under his black fur.

?He?s stronger than he looks,? Thrayjen said. ?And good at his craft.?

?So I?ve seen,? Hapley said contemplatively. ?Did you speak to him because you cared, or to make your life easier??

Thrayjen stopped, frowning at the fox. Hapley turned to look at him, meeting the rat?s eyes and with a scrutinizing stare. Thrayjen?s hackles rose at the fox?s question.

?Both,? he answered simply.

?Blue says you?re very good at following orders,? Hapley said. ?You work hard for her. No wonder Nire favours you.?

?Nire favours no one,? Thrayjen quickly reminded Hapley.

?Indeed. Blue says you?re looking for someone.?

?Many beasts are,? Thrayjen said lowly. The fox nodded his head sagely.

?Many have no help.?

?I don?t doubt that,? Thrayjen replied. Hapley?s mouth grew thin.

?I?ve been keeping an eye on you for a while. Not many beasts come in here with such well-rehearsed manners and the ability to fight like you.? The fox tilted his head again, searching Thrayjen?s eyes. ?Nire?s not the only one who?s interested. You stand three heads taller than any rat I?ve ever seen.?

?May I return to the mess hall?? Thrayjen asked. The fox?s nosey questions and rambling had grated his hungry stomach enough. The rat was indignant that Hapley knew he was searching for someone; someone he didn?t trust knew he wanted something, and it would only take a word to Nire to dash any hope of finding Helix and Verna.

?I?? Hapley hesitated, his quiet words petering off into a mere whisper. ?You don?t like Nire, do you? It?s fine; I?m not going to run off and tell him. There?s hardly a slave what draws breath that loves their master.?

Thrayjen rolled his eyes but shrugged. ?You?d be right.?

?I might be able to help you.?

Thrayjen?s ears perked up but his eyes remained narrowed. Nobeast gave anything away in the Crater; the fox was up to something. Hapley took the rat?s silence as permission to explain and he looked around before resuming his stride, slower than before.

?The vandalizing of the Crater sigil a few days back?Nire is up in arms over it, even still. It was?reminiscent of the symbol from a slave rebellion several seasons ago.?

Thrayjen rolled his eyes, curling a lip disdainfully; he knew what was coming. ?You want me to keep an eye on my fellow slaves, is that it?? Thrayjen asked, placing his paws on his waist. ?To root out any rumours because some pup painted a plaque??

Hapley eyes brightened with Thrayjen?s words and a smile spread across his face.

?Quite the opposite,? Hapley said. Thrayjen blinked, cocking his head.

?Eh??

?I know beasts that might be able to help you find whoever you?re looking for. Beasts on the outside. Now that Nire?s is sponsoring you?we could use that.?

Thrayjen felt his stomach plummet even further. His suspicions about the fox had been correct; Hapley was not to be trusted.

Wreckless beast!

?No,? Thrayjen stated firmly, and hastily turned the other way. Hapley grabbed his shoulder, forcing him to turn back and face the fox.

?Hear me out,? the fox commanded, but Thrayjen made to jerk away. Hapley tightened his grip. ?I?m risking everything to talk to you, so hear me out. I picked you because, from everything I?ve seen and heard, you?re a genuinely good beast.?

Heat rose in Thrayjen?s chest as he sneered. Thrayjen squared his shoulders and brought himself to his full height, meeting Hapley at nose level and scowling deeply.

?And that entitles you to put my life in danger? I?ve got enough trouble as it is without you whispering conspiracies.?

?We can help you find-?

?I already have help,? Thrayjen hissed. ?And I?ve earned it through keeping my head down, which is exactly what I intend to keep doing. For all I know, Nire sent you to test my loyalty. I won?t fall for schemes.?

Hapley took a deep breath before he stomped on Thrayjen?s footpaw. The rat restrained a yelp but his loss of balance made it easy for the fox to slam him into the wall. Hapley?s hot breath beat down into his face as the fox angrily bared his teeth.

?Don?t squander this,? the fox growled. ?I like Blue, she?s a good girl, good at heart, but she can?t do what we can, but we?re against Nire and we can help you.?

?If I help you, you mean,? Thrayjen growled back. Hapley sighed deeply, letting his grip fall from Thrayjen.

?They fell, last time. They were weak and ill prepared, but this time-?

?It?s always the way, isn?t it,? Thrayjen interrupted. He stepped away from the fox, running his paws over the creases in his shirt. ?Same story every time, although nobody ever remembers anything but the legends. ?This time will be different?! Absurd fancy.?

?What are you talking about?? Hapley snapped, looking around again as he realized how loud he had been.

?I?ve seen slave revolts before,? Thrayjen explained, unable to hide the note of disgust in his voice as he glared at Hapley. The fox was going to get himself killed and drag Thrayjen down with him. ?They never succeed. There?s never enough beasts, never enough weapons, never a good enough escape plan even if you do manage to breach the walls??

The rat trailed off, shaking his head as visions of red mud and chains clouded his eyes. ?In the end, you?re all dragged back and you all die, and the wives and the children suffer more than before without their mates and fathers.?

Thrayjen took another step back, shutting his eyes and remembering the screams. With every flaying lash of the whip, his tail twitched, his laughter deafening inside his head.

?With your help, we could conquer The Crater,? Hapley said, a note of pleading entering his voice. ?We have beasts everywhere, and Nire isn?t the only one who knows your true power. Knows where you?re from, who you know??

Thrayjen?s head snapped up and he spat at the ground between Hapley?s footpaws. The fox reeled back in surprise and Thrayjen pointed a threatening claw at him.

?I won?t let you ruin me.? The rat spoke lowly, shaking slightly as his tail lashed. ?Nire?s fear spawns from lessons learned from your last failure. I won?t let you spoil everything I?ve worked towards. I?ve made it too far.?

Hapley?s horrified look struck Thrayjen as alarming. He couldn?t let the fox think he was a threat if Hapley was attached to a rebellion of some kind, but neither could he lend help to the cause. With a deep breath, Thrayjen steadied himself.

?I?ll pretend this never happened,? Thrayjen assured the fox. ?Blue looks up to you, and it?d destroy her to find out you?re?.? The rat sniffed. ?Well. You?d best conduct your business in private. I won?t be part of this, but I won?t stop you. I doubt you?ll get far enough to warrant worrying, anyway.?

?Why would I trust you?? Hapley said flatly. His paw edged in his sleeve towards where his scalpel lay hidden.

?You ?wouldn?t run off and tell? Nire,? Thrayjen said. Hapley?s narrowed eyes softened slightly. ?I won?t, either. Change your mind, Master Hapley. You can?t change anything else.?

?You won?t get far without outside help,? Hapley tried again. ?Think about what we can do for each other, all the lives you could help! At least tell me who you?re looking for.?

?No. I have too much to lose.?

?Coward!? Hapley snapped.

Thrayjen let out a bark of laughter. Hapley had no idea what he was asking of him, of the death and misery the ?help? he thought Thrayjen could provide would truly bring.

?That?s not the first time I?ve heard that. You have no idea how true it is. How frightened I am now that I have something to fear for.? He pointedly caught Hapley?s eye. ?Two reasons, in fact.?

A look of realization rolled over Hapley. ?Family. You?re searching for family. Children? Yes, of course. We can be your friends,? Hapley insisted. ?Let me help you.?

?No. And I never saw you, either. I?m going to eat my lunch now, and then go get my hide tanned for being late to training. Leave me be. Please. Please.?

Walking away, Thrayjen ignored the fox as Hapley tried to call him. Hapley didn?t pursue but Thrayjen felt his eyes following him down the length of the hall until he turned the corner. He paused, quietly listening for Hapley?s footpaws to signal the fox coming to silence him. When no assassin approached, Thrayjen made his way back to the mess hall, his pace hurried.

Food could not calm his unease, tasting spoiled in his mouth. Thrayjen?s eyes kept flittering about, landing on every beast and every shadow. How large was Hapley?s group of ?friends?? Had the fox been a test, sent by Nire?

His eyes met those of a startling white mouse and for a moment Thrayjen thought she was staring at him. The mouse blinked and her unfocused eyes fled his gaze as she looked down at the large book in her lap, shaking her head just slightly as she resumed her study. Thrayjen, too, snapped from his reverie, letting his sight fall from hers. He sighed in relief, mocking himself for mistaking the daydreaming beast as a threat even as his eyes trailed along her collarbone to toned arms, and further still around curving hips.

The white, curly furred maiden had fought earlier that week, sending one creature to their deaths and another into an even worse state. She was no lackey of Nire?s but rather a beast determined to live, exactly like himself. Thrayjen had been impressed, watching the maid try and coax the madness from her companion until she saw the inevitable and defended herself accordingly. She had been the only beast of three to walk from the arena that day, and the rat found himself appreciating her ability to do what was necessary. The mouse understood the Crater. She knew what had to be done.

Keep Nire?s favour, Thrayjen told himself, looking around as he heard Aldridge?s voice call him to training from the doorway.

Play my game. Don?t lose.